• Laura Massetti spent 15 years leading teams and saw Gen Z workers struggle with unwritten rules.
• Massetti said Gen Z workers need training on communication, judgment, and follow-through.
• As AI levels technical skills, Massetti said human skills can help early-career workers stand out.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Laura Massetti, founder of Real Work Ready, which helps early-career professionals develop workplace skills. Massetti has more than a decade of experience in the corporate world, leading sales and marketing teams. The essay has been edited for length and clarity.

I spent 15 years in the corporate world, leading sales and marketing teams. I loved mentoring early professionals, but I often found myself thinking: My goodness, I wish I could make this process go quicker.

I never only look at whether someone could do the work. It is more about whether they could communicate clearly, exercise good judgment, and follow through.

As a career coach for young workers, I know there are things that you, as an employee, get judged on that no one actually puts inside the rubric. We expect people to figure them out over time, but in reality, someone has to teach them.

Gen Z needs feedback in a workplace that expects people to figure things out

I don’t think that Gen Z is unready for work. I think no one has taught them what to do.

This generation grew up with a cellphone in their hands. They’d post something on Instagram and get 10 likes. They’re used to instant feedback: Tell me what I need to grow.

That’s not how the workplace is built. We have annual reviews. You learn through experience; you learn the hard way.

Young workers are digitally fluent, which makes this generation incredible for so many reasons. But growing up digitally, compounded by the pandemic, left gaps in opportunities to practice face-to-face interaction.

Now they’re entering workplaces with other generations, and those generations set the rules.

Meanwhile, AI is taking on tasks that used to help people develop. We learned shoulder to shoulder with someone. How are new hires supposed to learn if we’re outsourcing those opportunities?

You’re being judged on things no one puts in the rubric

There are areas you’re being judged on that no one actually puts inside the rubric, including communication and clarity, prioritization and judgment, your ability to follow through, professional presence and credibility, ownership and reliability, and organizational awareness.

It’s not just about how you communicate. When you enter the workplace, do you know how to get stuff done? How aware are you of the organization you operate in?

You need to understand when to use email, when to use Slack, and when to stop by someone’s office. You can’t walk in and assume you know the rules.

In one new-hire program at a company with about 100,000 employees, a manager told me that someone had pinged the CEO on Slack to request a skip-level meeting. Mind you, that would’ve been probably 10 skip levels.

Poor thing, he had no idea. No one had told him that wasn’t how you reached out to the CEO in that organization.

I’ve also seen people show up to meetings unprepared, without what they needed or knowing how to follow up.

Dressing appropriately is something I had to learn on my own. About six months into my job, I wore a full black business suit to a meeting in Miami. It absolutely did not match the environment. I was way too formal.

Match the client’s environment and match how they dress. The other day, I saw someone meeting their manager in a suit jacket over a basketball jersey and shorts, but wearing loafers. Your job is to show your manager that they can trust you to be professionally present and to deliver.

Managers have a responsibility here, too. When we say, “They’ve been here for two years, and they’re just not getting it,” we need to ask ourselves: What aren’t they getting? What am I judging them on that I haven’t clearly explained?

Practice the human skills that will set you apart

My company now offers a six-month program that combines online training with weekly role-playing of workplace scenarios.

We practice things like how to react when you receive feedback. The goal is to give people experiences they might otherwise wait years to encounter.

My advice to every fresh graduate and those entering the workforce is that, at a time when AI is making skill sets equalizers, you will need to define how you’ll be different.

Technical skills are still incredibly important. But how do you communicate, exercise judgment, execute an idea, and get people’s buy-in?

I’ve never made a hiring decision based on technical capability alone. It’s mostly about whether I can trust that person.

Knowing the ins and outs of coding is one thing. Being able to speak to a boardroom and convince people of an idea is another ability you can bring to an employer.

Those are the skills I believe will make all the difference.

After 20 years of balancing her corporate leadership roles with motherhood, Trisha Daab was ready for a break.

"Life had felt like sprinting a marathon for as long as I could remember," Daab, 47, told Business Insider. "I had no idea how tired I was until I stopped working."

In her year off, she tap danced, volunteered at a food bank, traveled to Disneyland and Alaska, and spent more time with her kids. By the end, she had decided she couldn't go back to her old life.

"My job often demanded that it came first — never-ending to-do lists, urgent emails, travel, and always chasing the next promotion," Daab, who's now a travel writer and substitute teacher, said. "Stepping away helped me realize my priorities had shifted."

Now in their 30s and 40s, many millennial women are skeptical of corporate and instead becoming business owners, content creators, and mothers, prioritizing more flexible work schedules. Instead of striving to get to the top, they're inverting Sheryl Sandberg's mantra of the 2010s — and leaning out.

Sandberg, Meta's former COO, told Business Insider that the corporate exodus is due to women feeling undervalued at work.

"This is not the women who are saying, 'I don't want to do it,'" Sandberg, 57, said. "It's the women saying, 'I don't want to do it because I'm not wanted, I'm not getting the same opportunities and the same support, and I face an unfair burden at home.'"

Even Lean In, the organization founded by Sandberg and named after her 2013 bestselling book, is noticing a recent shift in women's ambitions in the workforce.

According to the organization's 2025 Women in the Workplace report, published in December 2025, which surveyed 9,500 US employees across 124 organizations, women were less likely to say they wanted a promotion compared to men. This was true when filtered to include only millennials, who made up roughly one-third of participants.

When asked why, over 28% of millennial women said "personal obligations" made it hard for them to take on more — compared to 17% of millennial men.

Annie Wright, a licensed psychotherapist who works with Silicon Valley leaders, has also observed more of her millennial female patients shifting their ideas about what constitutes a fulfilling career.

"I'm watching them make more person-centered choices than necessarily career-only-driven choices," she told Business Insider. "I don't think many millennial women are becoming less ambitious. I think they're just becoming less willing to confuse ambition with self-erasure."

The rise and fall of the have-it-all girlboss

Let's, for a moment, remember what is now referred to as the "girlboss era" of the 2010s.

It was a time of She-E-O-led startups, of crushed velvet sofas and the words "I Want It All" aglow in cursive neon lettering. Of earnest enjoyment of "Fight Song" and T-shirts with earnest phrases like "feminist" and "woman up."

Of a future that was female, tinged millennial pink — until a series of public reckonings punctured the fantasy. Leaders of several companies stepped down amid allegations of toxic workplace cultures, exposing the facade of the girlboss promise.

Then came the remote work culture of 2020. Suddenly, many women had time to breathe, whether that meant not rushing to day care pickup, having more time to work out or see friends, or simply not being "on" all the time.

For some, the slowly creeping requirement to return to the office dealt the final blow.

Misty Heggeness, a professor at the University of Kansas specializing in gender economics, described the influx of new RTO policies by some companies as having a "chilling effect."

"That does disproportionately disadvantage women in general," Heggeness told Business Insider, "just because women are more likely to carry an invisible load of work within families."

The working mom paradox

After the birth of her first child, Kendra Rothermel switched from full-time to part-time work as an office manager while her husband remained at his full-time job. "As we grew our family, it made sense for me to have a more flexible schedule," Rothermel, 34, told Business Insider.

When she had her third baby, his clubfoot diagnosis meant frequent orthopedic appointments. Even part-time work wasn't flexible enough, so she eventually started her own venture helping small businesses with operations and marketing.

Rothermel said she was partly inspired by watching other working moms do the same.

A recent analysis of job-market data by Matthew Nestler, a senior economist at KPMG, found that labor force participation between December 2023 and May 2026 decreased among college-educated women with children under 5. Meanwhile, participation increased for women without children and most groups of men, including fathers.

Because millennials are generally having kids later than previous generations did, Heggeness said parents, moms in particular, are more likely to be parenting young children just as their work responsibilities are ramping up.

"If they were going to lean out, now would be the time," she said, whether it's to save on childcare costs or introduce more flexibility.

Add to the list aging parents. The costs of childcare and eldercare, sometimes unaffordable even with the intense work commitments required to afford them, have prompted some women to leave their full-time jobs for more flexible or minimum-wage work.

To Sandberg, it's a sign that companies are not adequately adjusting to meet women where they are, whether that's offering more flexible hours, longer parental or bereavement leave options, or better healthcare coverage.

"We're at a critical moment in time for women, because what a lot of women are seeing is that commitment to them in leadership pulling back," Sandberg said. "Then what's happening to them is their ambition is pulling back. And that's a loss. It's a loss for our economy. It's a loss for our companies. It's a loss for our children."

The allure of going at it alone

Not all women who are leaning out are doing so because they are overworked. Some, like Heigi Jeong, 30, have dreams beyond corporate America.

"While I wouldn't say I loved the work, I liked it," Jeong, who made $173,000 working in product design, told Business Insider. "It was my dream job as an immigrant, and it was sustainable."

Still, Jeong was pulled toward her other ambitions: writing a book and being a content creator. She was also intrigued by the idea of being her own boss.

"When I'm working for myself, I entirely choose the role I will play," Jeong said. "I wanted to experience it myself and have my own take rather than constantly wondering 'What if I quit?'"

Three months after quitting, she enjoys not feeling as rushed as she used to, even if the price is an inconsistent income.

Both Heggeness and Wright have noted a growing interest in entrepreneurship and self-employment among women. A 2024 Census working paper found that the share of women business owners under 45 rose between 2012 and 2020, with the biggest increase among women ages 25 to 34. It also found that newer women-owned employer businesses were disproportionately owned by women under 35.

The creator economy opened another path. More than 200 million people worldwide now identify as content creators, though that broad figure includes far more than full-time influencers. Some Gen Z and millennial consultants are even leaving MBB and Big Four firms to build audiences and businesses online — trading the girlboss crown for a bubble headband.

In a 2023 Vogue article, writer Daisy Jones wrote that the newest iteration of girlboss swaps grind culture with the similarly perfectionistic "soft life" defined by travel and lucrative brand deals. Pantsuits were exchanged for sweatpants; speaking engagements and spread-thin multitasking gave way to self-care and supplement stacks.

"In some ways, the career woman appears to have been replaced by the health-conscious woman," Jones wrote, "the one who prioritizes her vitamin intake, hydration, and sleep cycle over endless meetings and salary increases."

Content creation doesn't come without its own costs. Plenty of influencers report feeling financially insecure or overworked, unable to take a day off without losing money.

Still, if they're going to burn out or worry about their job security, some figure they might as well enjoy their autonomy to create their own schedules.

"For some women, there's been a paradigm shift in values," Wright said. "Promotion or success now looks like more availability, presence, and freedom."

When everyone leans out

Sandberg, who herself stepped down as Meta's COO in 2022 to pursue philanthropy and early-stage investing ventures, said she supports women's career choices, whatever they may be.

"I think being at home with your children is great," she said. "Going back to school, great. Starting a company, great. Going part-time, great. Anything you want to do is great."

Part of the issue, she said, is that without female leaders, there are simply fewer people to advocate for the very policies that make other women more excited to move up in a company, be it egg-freezing coverage, lactation rooms, or more competitive maternity leave options.

It's why she feels companies need to do more work to assess why women are leaning out enough to jump ship entirely. "It's easy to overly characterize the words 'lean in,'" she said. "What I mean by them is very clear: I think women should make decisions based on believing in their own abilities, based on believing that they should and can have the same opportunities as men."

It's just a shame, she continued, if the decision stems from not feeling valued enough in the corporate world.

"I just hope that enough women want those senior leadership roles," she said, "that we get the environment for women that they deserve."

• I spent my 20s believing that working hard and making money were the keys to independence.
• I realized I was working so much that I had no time or energy to enjoy the life I was building.
• Years later, being an ambitious woman looks different to me. I work less and have time for myself.

I thought making a lot of money and working hard would make me happy.

In my early 20s, I got great grades and finished my undergrad in three years. By my mid-20s, I had finished my graduate degree in law while frequently working 70-hour weeks.

I leaned into the idea of being a girlboss, often working weekends or through my lunch, and focusing on making lots of money. It was a habit I saw modeled by my parents. It worked for them, and I thought it would work for me, until it didn't.

I thought hard work was the point

At 26, I worked long days at my home desk after making "hard worker" and "responsible'"my identity for years. I thought this was what an independent woman was: someone who worked constantly and optimized all of her time.

Sure, I was saving lots of money and networking, but I was often too tired on my day off to do anything. I often chose to work on Saturdays and didn't even have time to spend my hard-earned money.

Two things made me realize this wasn't a sustainable lifestyle: I once told a friend I couldn't take a 15-minute lunch break to call her, and another time I struggled to lift my full duffle bag for an upcoming trip after not working out for months.

Something had to give.

I didn't want to just recover from burnout

I was clearly burned out. I could have taken some time off to recover and come back, but then the cycle would have continued.

It helped that I spent my early 20s in Cameroon and Costa Rica, two places where work-life balance looks a lot different than it does in the US, and people live with their parents much longer. Looking back on those years when I was truly happy helped me to question what I was focusing on in my life.

I came to a new conclusion. I didn't want to simply recover after burning out. I wanted to reject the premise that burnout was the price of being an ambitious woman.

I stopped hustling toward anything

In 2022, as the COVID restrictions were lifted more and a relationship I had been in ended, I decided to travel while working a few hours per week. As a then single, childfree woman, no longer heading towards a career, I wondered what I'd replace these traditional markers of success with. The answer turned out to be nothing.

I stopped trying to hustle toward something. No job, boss, passion, or person was going to truly reward me for committing to 70-hour weeks. Nothing was worth putting off a breakfast date with myself or an unplanned walk in the park, or that 15-minute phone call I told my friend I couldn't take.

I decided to opt out of the competitive nature of the working world and instead focus on optimizing myself.

5 years later, my life looks different

Five years later, I have a life my 26-year-old self would barely recognize. I work substantially less, have built a career around writing and research for companies with values I admire, and have spent the past several years living and traveling in different countries.

I don't own a car or a home, and I'm not chasing a traditional career ladder. Instead of constantly asking what I should accomplish next, I have far more time for cooking, relationships, travel, and simply being alive.

One thing I did keep from that previous era of my life was my deep conviction that I, and all women, need to be financially independent. I have stopped suggesting that my friends work through their lunch break; instead, we talk about ethical investing and the need to always have one's own bank account.

Independence turned out to mean something else for me

The surprising part is that opting out didn't ruin my career, and I didn't feel the need to replace work with anything else. I don't think chasing a job title, a salary, or a full calendar would have made me feel secure.

I think I would have constantly felt the need to prove myself, which sounds exhausting to me now. Instead, I have the independence I sought when I was younger. It just took the form of letting go of the idea that I have to constantly prove my worth to myself.