Login
“Being grateful is being able to look at life from a more positive perspective”
We wake up to news of wars, fall asleep to reports of crises, and in between, we scroll through a screen that rarely gives us a reason to smile. In this scenario, talking about gratitude might seem like a luxury, or even naive. But is it really?
For psychotherapist Angela Masuzzo, the answer is clear: looking for reasons to hope is not naive; it is necessary. “Without hope, we often cannot move forward,” she states. In this conversation ahead of Thanksgiving, the psychotherapist helps us understand what happens within us when we choose to give thanks and why that choice is far from being just a pleasant feeling.
The specialist explains that our brains have a natural tendency to give more weight to what goes wrong than to what goes well. This is the so-called negativity bias, which social media and constant news consumption make even more intense. To counter this effect, she proposes something she calls “self-preservation”: knowing one’s own limits and knowing when to disconnect, without ceasing to care about the world.
Throughout the interview, Angela Masuzzo also distinguishes healthy optimism from so-called “toxic positivity”—the kind that forces us to say everything is fine when, inside, we are exhausted, anxious, or sad. For the psychotherapist, being optimistic requires courage: the courage to be honest about how we feel and, even so, to believe that there are viable paths forward.
Her simplest advice is also the hardest to follow nowadays: pause. Pause to see, hear, and notice the small things—like a conversation, a gesture of affection, or a shared meal—that we so often take for granted.
As the daughter of immigrants who left for Brazil after World War II, Angela Masuzzo knows firsthand the value of fresh starts. Because of this, she looks with special fondness upon the experience of immigrant communities, such as the Portuguese in Canada, who have learned to value every achievement because they know all too well the price paid for it.
This is a conversation that reminds us that, even on the hardest days, there is still so much to be thankful for.
Milénio Stadium: From a psychological standpoint, what happens within us when we practice gratitude? Is it merely a pleasant feeling, or does it have tangible effects on our well-being and mental health?
Angela Masuzzo: Gratitude is something that we should all cultivate in our daily lives. Practicing gratitude is often simply shifting the focus away from what we think we lack and learning to value and appreciate what we have in the present, as well as what we have already experienced in the past.
Being grateful is being able to look at life from a more positive perspective, recognizing the good things even when we are going through difficult times. Maintaining this focus can contribute to a more balanced mental health and help us live in a more optimistic, humble, and conscious way.
Gratitude also helps us accept that we won’t always have everything we desire at the exact moment we want it. Sometimes, what didn’t happen, what we don’t yet have, or even something we lost might be part of a larger process that we cannot yet comprehend.
Cultivating gratitude does not mean ignoring life’s hardships, pain, or challenges. It means learning to recognize that, even in the midst of them, there are still reasons to give thanks. It is a simple practice, but one that can transform the way we see ourselves, the people around us, and our own lives.
MS: Wars, economic crises, polarization, non-stop bad news… With so much negativity around us, is it naive to look for reasons to hope? What can help us find reasons to keep the light of hope in humanity burning?
AM: It is by no means naive to look for reasons to hope. Without hope, we often cannot move forward.
There is a lot happening in the world today. For people who are more sensitive to all these news items and events, practicing “self-preservation” can be very important.
And what does that mean? It doesn’t mean becoming indifferent individuals who don’t care about the world or what is happening. It means having the ability to assess our own limits and recognize how much we can absorb emotionally before that information begins to affect us negatively.
Limiting our constant exposure to news—whether on television, social media, artificial intelligence, or any other media outlet—can help relieve that emotional overload. We don’t need to be plugged in all the time to everything that is happening to remain conscious and engaged with the world.
Sometimes, preserving our emotional health means knowing when to stop. It means stepping away for a few hours or a few days and directing our attention toward the positive things that also exist around us.
Caring for ourselves in this way is neither selfishness nor a lack of awareness. It is a way to protect our ability to continue feeling empathy, to keep the light of hope burning, and to believe that, despite so many difficulties, there are still many good things happening in the world.
MS: We seem to have a natural tendency to focus more on what goes wrong than on what goes well. Why does this happen? And in what ways do social media and constant news consumption fuel this pessimistic view of the world?
AM: Yes, that tendency is real, and the reason why it happens is a good question. It is due to the so-called negativity bias. What does that mean? Simply that our brain has a natural inclination to give more importance to negative things than to positive ones. Our attention ends up being more directed toward a potential danger, a threat, a loss, or a conflict.
Social media and constant news consumption cause this effect to become even more intense. We are surrounded by news about the world, our country, and people that isn’t always positive, and that can reinforce a more pessimistic view of the world and even of humanity.
Often, it is human beings themselves who are involved in conflicts, wars, violence, crises, and other problems that end up being precisely the news we hear, read, and consume daily. When we are repeatedly exposed to this type of content, we can begin to get the impression that everything is worse than it actually is.
Therefore, it is important to remember that what receives the most attention in the news does not always represent reality as a whole. There are also many good things happening, people helping other people, and positive changes, but those don’t always receive the same spotlight.
MS: Can a more positive outlook truly help us live better? What is the distinction between healthy optimism and “toxic positivity,” which forces us to pretend that everything is fine?
AM: Yes, but that is a conscious and intentional decision we have to make to protect ourselves, including protecting our physical and mental health.
Practicing healthy optimism requires courage: the courage to be truthful and honest with ourselves and with what we are experiencing. When we enter the cycle of “pretending” that everything is fine, we often don’t get to experience optimism in a light and genuine way. On the contrary, we can end up in a constant state of alert, in that well-known “fight or flight response.” We are always trying to run, avoid, or protect ourselves from what we feel might hit us.
Being present and practicing honesty in a careful manner is not easy in today’s world. Many people aren’t truly interested in a real answer. The question “How are you doing?” is often already accompanied by an almost automatic response: “I’m good, thanks.” And it stops there.
But how many people are screaming inside, hidden behind that “everything’s fine”? How many are merely functioning, smiling, fulfilling their obligations, while inside they are exhausted, anxious, sad, or overwhelmed?
Perhaps that is precisely where courage comes in: the courage to be a little more honest. That doesn’t mean exposing everything to everyone, nor living life only talking about hardships. It means acknowledging what we are truly feeling, respecting our own boundaries, and allowing space for both pain and hope to exist.
Healthy optimism isn’t pretending that nothing is wrong. It is looking at reality as it is, recognizing what is difficult, and yet choosing to believe that there are possibilities, resources, people, and paths that can help us move forward. Perhaps, with a bit more honesty and less need to pretend, we can live in a lighter and more authentic way.
MS: What small daily habits or gestures can help us cultivate gratitude and a more positive mindset, both within ourselves and our families? And what advice would you give to someone going through a difficult time who feels they have nothing to be grateful for?
AM: There are people who have immense difficulty seeing the small positive things around them, and sometimes even quite significant ones.
Gratitude is a state of mind. When it doesn’t arise naturally, we can cultivate it at different moments in our lives. It is about developing the awareness that, no matter the size of the problem, difficulty, or obstacle we are facing, there is almost always an important lesson in that process. And that lesson, in itself, already deserves gratitude.
Human beings, in a way, have grown accustomed to never being completely satisfied. We are always looking for something more, something bigger, something better. And that “something more” can often be related precisely to the difficulty of recognizing and valuing what we already have in our lives.
This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t want to grow, change, achieve, or seek better things. The problem begins when we are so focused on what we don’t yet have that we stop seeing what is already present. And, often, important things pass right before our eyes without us realizing it.
My first suggestion would be: pause. Simply pause. Stop and begin to see, feel, hear, and pay attention. Pay attention to words, gestures, people, events, and small moments that pass us by unnoticed because we are always searching for “something” bigger, better, or different.
Sometimes, it’s a conversation. A gesture of affection. Someone remembering us. A text message. A moment of peace on a hard day. A meal. The opportunity to be with someone we love. Even small things that, because they are always present, we end up taking for granted.
And perhaps that is precisely where gratitude lives: not just in grand achievements, but in the ability to notice what is already happening while we are living it.
Because what happens when we don’t do that? We go on autopilot. We wake up, work, solve problems, handle our responsibilities, chase the next goal, think about what is missing, what we still want to achieve… and the day ends.
Then another day begins, and another. And, without realizing it, we can become people who simply exist, but aren’t truly living.
Cultivating gratitude is also cultivating presence. It is being able to step out, if only for a few moments, from this constant search for what is missing and look at what already exists. Because, often, the life we are waiting to live in the future is already happening right now. We just need to be able to notice it.
MS: For many immigrants, such as the Portuguese in Canada, life was built on sacrifices and fresh starts. Do you think this experience teaches people to appreciate the small things more and hold on to hope?
AM: Most certainly. I am the daughter of immigrants who went to Brazil after World War II, and I witnessed firsthand how they valued everything they achieved. I saw up close the sacrifices that were made, the effort to restart life in an unfamiliar place, far from what they knew, often out of necessity rather than mere choice.
There is something very profound in that experience. Starting over requires far more than willingness. It requires courage, perseverance, and the ability to believe that there is something better on the other side.
Everyone who prepares to immigrate needs, in some way, to cling to something stronger than themselves to keep going. It could be family, faith, a dream, an opportunity, the hope of providing a different life for their children, or simply the need to survive and build a new beginning.
Hope goes hand in hand with that perseverance and courage. Without hope, it becomes very difficult to envision a different future. And, in the end, that is precisely what every immigrant seeks: a different future.
Not necessarily a perfect future, but a future with more possibilities, more security, more dignity, or more opportunities than those left behind.
And perhaps that is why many immigrant families learn to value small victories so deeply. Because they know the price paid for them. They know that many things that seem simple or guaranteed to some were the result of immense effort, sacrifice, and courage.
Hope, in this sense, is not just waiting for something to get better. It is continuing to walk even without having all the guarantees, believing that today’s effort can make room for a different reality tomorrow.
Madalena Balça/MS
